Personal Blogging: Helpful or Vengeful?
If you are going to publish something on the internet, expect that it will be seen by everybody! If you are tracking incoming hits to your site, don’t think that just one person in a given area will be looking. Keywords are a funny thing. Your intended audience might see what you write, but so will everybody else that’s looking for those keywords.
My point: Since I write on topics that deal with North Dakota, and particularly Jamestown, I have searches set up to pull in "every" story with certain, local, keywords. Sometimes the stories have nothing to do with a topic that I want to write about.
EDITED: As requested by Angela (and since I’m a nice guy…really), I have removed the blockquoted text. Most people wouldn’t do this. The links that remain may not continue to work, since she plans to remove the posts, as indicated in the comments.
Example of what "not" to do when blogging:
A recent break-up and a conclusion that Jason is actually reading.
July 14, 2006 – Dear God…Please Let Jason Grow a Pair
Obviously, Jason was not the only person visiting this site, eight times. Maybe Jason "never" visited the site.
Another example from the same site:
Running a attack campaign against somebody that broke your heart, for the whole world to see.
What Kind of Man Is Jason M***** of Jamestown ND?
I don’t know the person who wrote this and I don’t know Jason. I just thought that I should point out the fact that what you write, online, becomes a part of a permanent record, whether intended, or not.
This isn’t always a bad thing. I’ve "gone on record" with some pretty snarky views, myself, and I’ll stand by them until I happen to change my mind. When reading anything on the internet, always consider the source and the point of view of the person who wrote it. In the case, above, she obviously just went through a tough break-up, and is pretty hurt. The consequences of what she wrote (supposedly) was hundreds of angry, hate-filled, threatening emails sent to her "ex". There’s no way for the reader to determine if "any" of what she said is actually true or false, though.
The best thing to do is to stay away from personally attacking people, online, and if you do, make sure you can back it up. Then again, it could also land you a book deal.
Then again, sometimes watching vengence is pretty interesting, even if it’s not real. The link is "actually" some sort of viral marketing attempt for Court TV, and doesn’t have anything to do with the rest of this post, but it’s still pretty interesting.
Hi! First of all I do know it was Jason reading my blog…I have the IP address and he did admit.
Secondly, I can prove every single thing I said in the second post….every statement, every lie, was done in email. And I still have them.
Now then, I only posted specific hurts and specific lies that he told me. I did NOT do anything that would damage professionally, notr will I. If he or someone he knows reads my posting, will he be embarrassed? Most likely. And should he be ashamed? Absolutely.
And you should also note that I offered, many times to “let” Jason read my blog. And I told him that if he could point to anything that offended him or hurt him (prior to last night’s post) or that was not true, I would delete the post. He waited to read it, then LIED about why he read it (supposedly he’s receiving threats and someone from Jametown, may pose a danger to him), and quite frankly, it was one lie too many.
If Jason, or any his friends really want to the question the veracity of the contents of last night’s post, they may. And I will provide them with the emails in question.
Also, I’ve blogged about my probable cancer, my religion, my food issues and my childhood abuse…all of these personal and all of these have had or are having positive impact on people. Should I not have done so, since they are “personal”? And the posting regarding Jason make up a minute portion of the blog.
I think that maybe I gave the post an misleading title. I agree that blogging about personal issues is done all the time and “is” actually important in helping other people.
I confess that I didn’t go back through the archives of your blog, so I didn’t see all of the other issues that you’ve wrote about. I’ve, personally wrote about issues that were “personal”, and have read about many other personal things in other people’s lives.
I guess that the big issue I have with the the information you gave in the posts (especially the most recent) is that you pinpointed an individual, giving exact geographical location, and painted him in the darkest light possible.
Anybody that reads these could easily find out “exactly” who he is, where he lives, were he works, etc. Whether the family is considered pillars of the community or trailer trash, anybody who agrees with your side of the story could effectively destroy this guy’s life.
In the end, I think that the difference is blogging about personal matters and having a positive impact on people, or blogging about personal matters to hurt people.
No matter what, though, “I do” wish you the best! Not all guys are liers…
BTW: I’ll be changing the title of the post to something more appropriate, today.
Mr. Simpson, I wanted to make certain that the correct Jason was identified…there a million of them out there! And I did not intend to paint him in the darkest light possible. Those are merely the unadulterated, unshaded facts. The fact is, he lied to me. Deliberately and repeatedly. And the fact is, I was stupid enough to believe him. Also deliberately and repeatedly. I’m a reasonably well-educated adult, and yet, even when I knew better, I still chose to ignore the common sense God gave me. The realization of my stupidity and culpability is, frankly, as painful as the realization of the level of betrayal involved here. He should not have lied. I should not have believed him.
I don’t believe the posting is question was done out of vengeance-frankly there are many, worse things I could have done if that were my intent. Rather, this posting is an opportunity to expose one man who lied and open a dialogue about others who do the same. This is not the first time this has happened. One of my commentators went through a very similiar situation-I’m not sure if you read that?
People in relationships or looking for them, tell lies all the time. Some are simple, along the lines of-”no, I’m only 45,” and some are complicated and hurtful, along the lines of “no, I’m not married.” The lies Jason told were somewhere in the middle. They, like all lies, were intended to mislead, and I do firmly believe that he ended things, the way he did, because eventually he would have had to face the truth. Maybe, just maybe, what I posted will help others (perhaps even him) face the truth, whether about themselves or someone in their lives.
I had been contemplating removing the post. I have decided against doing that, but I will give serious thought to editing or removing the more obvious, geographical indicators.
-Angela
I’m posting my own character flaws, probably today, just to be fair. That said, I will take down my post(s) that directly discuss JM, if you will do the same. However, since you’ve quoted from my posts (and seem to have spun it), it has to be quid pro quo.
It should be noted that I do stand by everything I said in my posts, and do evidence to support my statements. It was not my intent to damage this person, only shame him, and I have since concluded that isn’t my job. Instead of being angry, I should be grateful that it didn’t go any further, and should perhaps pity him. Holding onto my anger will no doubt be counter-productive, long-term.
-Angela
Mr. Simpson (and ND),
I posted last night on what kind of person I really am-I’ve allowed my hurt to turn me into a little of a bitch, and I am sorry about that-and I also reedited the post that discusses what kind of person J. really is. In my hurt and, well, fury, I focused only on the few negative things. Very unfair (and bitch-like) of me. I’ve removed a few (about half) of the criticisms and added quite a few of the positives.
While I do still feel that my criticisms were valid, posting them in anger and hurt was wrong and immature, and I am sorry I did it.
-Angela